Description

By Mark Williams

ISBN: 978-1-78382-108-2
Published: 2014
Pages: 98
Key Themes: Mental Health, Depression, Post Natal Depression

Description

My name is Mark Williams, and I am happily married to Michelle Williams. I first met Michelle when I came back from a lads’ holiday, and was told we had to go to this particular nightclub in town. That night changed my life. What if we had come home the following day? What if I hadn’t gone to the same club? What if I hadn’t started to talk to this lady? What if I wasn’t so tanned and wearing my fake designer t-shirt from Turkey that wooed her…?

We all have what-ifs… but I can tell you, if we didn’t have Post Natal Depression, or if I didn’t have mild depression or if we didn’t plan to get married, or if we didn’t have our son Ethan… You know what? I wouldn’t be writing this book.

If we hadn’t gone through what we went through we wouldn’t be able to seek awareness, or start the support groups, or talk on BBC Radio to tell families to look after the partners as well. Or have someone do some research on me, for families in the near future.

It has been down to this horrible illness that I have changed my career for the better, and that in itself has made me and my family much happier. It’s crazy how a situation can actually put you on a different path in life, for me for the better and would I do it again? Go through this illness to get where I want to go in my time? Maybe not, I would say to you. Has it affected me? Of course it has: in a sense it has stopped us from having more children for our lovely son Ethan to keep company.

There are many ifs and buts in life, and we all know that life is a rollercoaster with many ups and downs. But I will tell you this for free: sometimes if life was simple and plain it would be very boring, wouldn’t it? Life experiences mean so much; they don’t mean living in the South of France on a yacht sunbathing with a glass of champers. No, real life experiences are the struggles and challenges we must face when dealing with daily life, to make us stronger as human beings.

When I look back over many moons and I think back – what I have done in my life, did it help people; was it the way I wanted it to pan out? – I will know that just speaking out about this illness would have helped someone, if not a lot of people, to get through depression.

It has been very challenging writing this book, being as honest as I can without leaving things out due to being in such a daze. But it was really hardest for my wife Michelle, who found it at times very upsetting reliving the days of Post Natal Depression. There were times when just thinking of what happened brought her close to despair.

So I would like to thank my wonderful wife Michelle for letting me share her moments and for letting me go ahead and write this book. Also for allowing me to start up fathersreachingout.com, which I am now pleased to say I’m very proud of. I have had lots of people telling me how great and proud I should be for starting the group and I am very much humbled to get so many emails from people not just in the United Kingdom but overseas as well. But what makes me proudest is staying with my family at a time when so many would have left.

I am very lucky to be a Father to my Son Ethan. I would honestly, hand-on-heart; die for that boy, even though I didn’t get those feelings that so many people say they do when he was born. It took me weeks before I started to feel the love I have for him now.

Also I would like to say a big thanks to my family who I couldn’t ask for any more from. They have been incredible, not just when we were going through the illness but in life in general. I couldn’t have a better family, and we have shared some wonderful experiences together as well as some bad and hurtful ones.

Also I would like to thank my extended family who I also wouldn’t change, especially my Mother in Law Jan. Without her giving up her work to come to live with us, life could have taken a different path and it may have taken longer for us to get back to normal.

Thanks too to my friends who have been so good to me, even though I shut you out and didn’t talk about what was going on. I wish I had now, as I know it’s the best medication, and I could have got a lot more off my chest. There were times when I was moody and upset with you, but my friends knew my true colours and thankfully accepted what I was going through at the time. Even though we’re all settled down now and don’t see each other as much, we still keep in contact.

Lastly I hope I did this book justice, as I have been as honest as I possibly can about my experience with Post Natal Depression and the mild depression I had myself. So I hope you enjoy, and please contact me on my site www.fathersreachingout.com to comment (only good ones please).

And remember, whatever you think of the book, and if you are going through this illness of depression, promise me one thing …

Talk today, don’t be afraid …
get your feelings out in the open and
Reach Out …