When I sat down to write this it was with no particular end in mind. I had just re-read Sei Shônagon’s pillow book and wondered what a twenty-first century pillow book might be like. In fifteenth century aristocratic Japan the reflections were on court life, the changing seasons, personal intrigues, manners. Through Sei Shonagan’s eyes and from her heart a picture is painted of her place and time that no regular history could capture. I thought it would be fun to see what a similar approach might reveal about today.

Besides, I had the time. I was recovering from a manic episode that had pretty much broken all of me. Plus I was coming to terms with my bi-polar diagnosis, receiving excellent treatment and guidance, and taking the time necessary to ensure a long happy life, with the ability to keep the beast under control.

Learning to adjust my thinking, and writing a book full of reflections, seemed to be a happy marriage. In a way they informed each other. My reflections kept me mindful of what I was thinking about. My therapy was given depth by the daily practice of that same mindfulness.

None of this was intentional, it just happened, and I never thought about it in this way at the time. Indeed, my understanding of Mindfulness as a specific therapeutic practice didn’t occur until well after finishing this book. I knew from therapy that I had to be constantly alert about my thoughts, especially those unhelpful ones that might trigger either a manic or depressive episode, but that was it. I put this down to the mind and body being instinctively knowledgeable about what they need to survive.

Mindfulness is simply stopping and being present in the moment. It’s not always easy to achieve, but when it is achieved it makes life more vivid. Mindfulness also comes with a heightened sense of gratitude, in a way that always thinking of either the past or the future doesn’t.

There are many good books on Mindfulness and many good counselors who can help you incorporate it into your life. This book, however, is not a ‘How To’, but an example of Mindfulness in action. Though created with no thought of a practical result, there was deliberateness in the writing to leave mental room for the reader to have their own Mindful reflections. So it’s the sort of book you can pick-up at any time, consider, then continue on your own path to recovery; with maybe a little extra hope on your side.

Some reflections talk directly to bi-polar, its symptoms and treatment. But the majority are simply thoughts that occurred to me as I gradually returned to health. The ruminations may be peculiar to me, but the subjects are able to be shared. In this way it hopefully has the benefit of group therapy, where you often learn more about yourself by listening to those around you.

Finally, I hope it occasionally makes you laugh. Therapy is often such a dry business, reaching deep into some of the most troubling aspects of our lives. I find being able to laugh at myself has made it easier.